The Mysteries of Africa

I've hardly been home this month -- visited Nairobi for 10 days, then Geneva for another 6. I did get a free day in Kenya, and went with friends to the closest National Park for a half day, followed by a visit to Karen Blixen's estate. The park was interesting. We saw the very rare black rhinoceros, a bunch of different sorts of antelopes, giraffes, zebras, warthogs, etc. I have many pictures that are best narrated by saying: "...and that black dot over there is an oryx..." And who knows? Maybe it is. It's the first time I've seen a reason for one of those monster telephoto lenses, but still am not tempted to carry one. The Blixen place was sort of interesting. As we drove toward it, suddenly all things were named Karen: Karen Elementary School, Karen Pharmacy, Karen Lumber Yard, Karen Fresh Fruit. And then we arrived at a lovely, modest bungalow centred in the midst of a large lawn. Tents were being erected for a wedding reception to be held that night. Signing on for a tour, we were warned that no photos were allowed inside the house, though the exterior was fair game. Why? Because the "out of africa" movie folks own the intellectual property rights to the appearance of the rooms of the house. Making that seem even stranger, no parts of the film were shot inside the house -- the rooms are too small to accommodate massive professional filming equipment. They had constructed a set (in Surrey) that looked about right, but leaving off at least one wall of each room so they could zoom in and out. Only the exterior had been in the film, and yet that was the part they hadn't bought the rights to. Another IP mystery to add to the collection.

Driving into Denver

Driving into Denver is an interesting experience for one having a foggy image of the place. First, I had no idea that Denver is not in the mountains. Signs seen in passing promise slopes all the way -- "Vail Right 200 feet". Yet from the airport it's 15 miles to town and there's not a hill in sight. When finally entering the city, you see them looming in the distance all blue and moody,. But really: this is Calgary. But smaller, older and apparently a lot richer in the old days.

Signs on the way in piqued my interest. First, as the shuttle navigates through successive districts, apparent differences in the ethnic/linguistic makeup are dramatic. In some areas the billboards are exclusively Spanish. Three blocks on, I see the same signs, with the same messages, but in English.

And then a treat: "Special today! Amish Built Garage Doors!" With extra width to accomodate the team's gear, I suppose.

one of the more unlikely lines...

I was recently watching the dvd packaged with Lyle Lovett's It's not big, it's large cd. In his comments on the song "don't cry a tear," Lyle says: "the first time I played this was at Hunter Thompson's memorial. Just after they shot him out of a cannon."

A water park for gnomes

This will likely be the start of a series of entries under the broad heading of Bathing Concept Fails. And it’s a worthy first – as near as I can tell a water park for gnomes. It would be a short gnome who could stand under the showerhead. Note too the complete lack of shower curtain or other device that might prevent flooding of the rest of the bathroom while using the water park. I assume the gnome slides are placed at the far side of the water park to prevent potentially disastrous flooding. Unfortunately, I am not a gnome, so I am not so much enjoying the challenge of showering in the water park. The nearest experience is the space customarily provided for pre-bath washing in a Japanese inn. (Best Western Trocadero la Tour Hotel, Paris (alleged to be 4 star), 9 March, 2009) Also remarkable here is the idea of having the Internet connection provided by a single line in that is shared with a fax machine. The fax has priority. In a hotel, the fax wins.

It's all in your perspective

A friend was being driven through Hyderabad and noticed some people sleeping on what passes for a lawn under a billboard. My friend commented to his companion, a government official, that there is also a serious homeless problem in the United States.

The official responded: "ah - but you see: we don't have a homeless problem in India. You look at those people and assume they are homeless. I look at them and I understand - that *is* their home."

No panic in Hyderabad

Despite the terrible goings on in Mumbai this week, I decided to stay with plans to go to Hyderabad for the UN Internet Governance Forum in any case. I confess to thinking the Mumbai attacks were so well organized they would have either consumed all the resources of whatever group organized them, or have been launched by some sect so well resourced and powerful they would be able to move quickly in other cities to create a broader sense of panic and disorder. It's too early to claim I was right, but it's looking like I might have been...

A colleague and I decided that, rather than suffer a weekend locked down in the hotel, we'd better test the waters, however timidly, and go see whatever there is in Hyderabad. It is not a very attractive town. The fairly lengthy Qutb Shahi dynasty produced the impressive Golconda fort, a huge palace, and a series of royal tombs, along with an array of large mosques. They can all be visited easily in a day. The government has developed a sensible pricing scheme for visiting historic sites, charging Indians 5 rupees (about 1.5¢) to visit and foreigners 100. But that is the start. Friendly-seeming locals then rush unwary visitors, and start to explain in vast detail what was before us. It eventually became evident that these folk have a complex (and expensive) rate card they've neglected to tell you about that might include items such as the following:
- 700 rupees per person for the "basic tour" ($17.50 ea)
- 400 rupees pp to have a cloth removed from a carved black marble sarcophagus ($10 ea)
- 500 rupees pp to have someone clap their hands to demonstrate an echo ($12.50 ea), etc.

Knowing none of this in advance, a tour can very easily become a major expense. Fortunately, we figured out the game early on: at the point we were asked to pay for having had the cloth whipped from the sarcophagus, so then denied all further services. No doubt I've missed many vital historical facts, but count on wikipedia to fill me in when necessary.

One of the highlights of the day was climbing to the top of the Charminar -- a four towered monument used at various times as a mosque, headquarters of a French expeditionary force, and the source of Madame Blavatsky's philosophical speculations. The thing is surrounded by a bustling market, and offers a fantastic vantage point from which t watch the chaos that is traffic in Hyderabad.

The good news is that all is calm and getting calmer now that the Mumbai sieges are over, or seems to be calm to 2 old white guys out touring the town. Of course, you might reasonably ask whether we'd even notice anything out of the ordinary without any real sense of what is ordinary in the first place...

I'm hoping my camera will rejoin me soon, following its vacation in Kenya, so I can post some photos later in the week.

William Gibson in Africa

On the second leg of a tour of Intercontinental Hotels of Africa, I was asked whether there is a problem getting broadband to all citizens in countries other than Kenya. Yes I said, and described the situation by quoting William Gibson: "The future is already here. It's just not evenly distributed." This came blindingly home when being transported for dinner in a Nairobi institution called The Carnivore. Rumour had it that elephant was on the menu this week (untrue as it turned out) so I declared myself vegetarian to avoid the possible ethical dilemma. But the drive over was a slice of bladerunner. We travelled in a heavy duty van through streets so clogged with traffic and exhaust the air was blue. HD screens of considerable size lined the streets showing the glories of mobile phones and new appliances. Meanwhile sad women carrying reaching, skinny children roamed through the traffic, knocking on windows and begging for pretty much anything on offer. Immense birds (called Marabou?) fill the tree tops. Scavengers apparently, and the locals say they are remarkable for their ability to digest entire bones, thanks to pouches of acid in their craws. Not a lot like Kansas.